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Over the years ehi logoI have taken in my fair share of movies and have watched a great many that focus on relationships. I have often heard a statement that people make when a relationship is coming to an end. It is often used as a means of getting out of a relationship by shifting the weight of responsibility onto one own self. This is a way to take false responsibility for the failing of the relationship. This is the tactic or the strategy of the person who wants out. No matter what the reason this statement is always hard to argue with whenever it’s used.

“It’s not You It’s Me” Have you ever heard this before? Has anyone ever said this to you before? Did you ever say this to someone else? “It’s not you It’s Me” Over that last few weeks I have begin to look at the power of this one statement as it pertains to so many areas of life. I know, the simplest approach to life is to a have every issue or problem be charged to someone else. This is the ultimate in conveniences. To essentially say it’s not Me it’s you. The source of my drama, my discomfort, my pain, my problems, my difficulties and all of my troubles boil down to YOU. “It’s not me It’s YOU” Wow!

The more and more I looked at this the more I uncovered that the former is truer than the latter. (It’s not you it’s Me) You see we can get some great understanding of self when we look at things this way. Because in life, it’s not what’s done to me it’s how I respond. It’s not the way you mistreat me, it’s the mistreatment I allow. It’s not the fact of you not valuing me; it’s me giving you that much power to be involved in my valuation of self in the first place. It’s not the love you don’t share or display; it’s me being secure in the love God has for me and the love I have for myself and being secure in those loves that’s essential.

(I know this is a bitter pill to swallow) There is some depth in this statement. It’s not You It’s ME. No matter how badly I want the blame to be on someone else the responsibility of what I do falls on me. It’s not you it’s me; don’t miss the liberating part of this statement. It does the one thing that’s impossible when you put the blame on someone else. It gives you the power to so say I Can and not I Can’t.  I have the power of I Can as it pertains to me. I can change the way I act, I can change the way I respond, I can change what I say, I can change the way I think, I can change what I am exposed to. I can change who I spend time with; I can change whatever it is about myself that challenges my growth. Yes I Can

Here’s the takeaway… When I shift the blame on someone else I am powerless to do anything about it but if I can accept that it’s not you it’s me. I am now empowered with knowledge of what I am accountable for and what I’m responsible to do.

Yeah It’s not you It’s ME

Motivation One Moment At A Time